681 Days...

We have been waiting for 681 days now. Out of curiosity I added it all up. That's a lot of days. Especially a lot of days in the beginning thinking we would get "the call" any time. Last year we celebrated National Adoption Day at a "Mercy Me" concert. This year I am supposed to speak to the District Superintendent at a conference regarding "the churches call to the orphan". I'm not sure how I feel about that. Many days I wish time would speed up to the day when the call actually comes in. Other days I wish time would slow, because my children I have already at home, are growing up too fast. When I look back, I think I have spent the last two years wishing my baby boy's life away. In January he will be 3. And that is the time I would begin to try to become pregnant with a biological child (Regarding the spacing of my 3 bio's). I have spent many days and hours holding my baby boy wishing about another baby which makes me feel guilty. So here I am in the time continuum wishing for time to speed up and time to slow down, and in some circumstances to turn back time.

681 days......How many more will it be until this adoption actually happens? If someone would have told me it would've taken this long I wouldn't have believed them. I would've thought I would begin the adoption of child #5. 681 days is a sobering thought. I miss you baby girl. I hope to actually see the fruits of my labor this month, when I see the picture of my baby girl.
God says: Those who are patient will be given rewards without measure....So we continue to wait....