(Our first hour together)
Its been a year and it feels like forever. My heart is aching. It was a year ago today that I was diligently getting ready for travel to pick up my baby girl in Ethiopia. I took the dog to the vet. I was packing last minute items. My husband stayed home with me. We spoke to the teachers at our kids school. Most really have
NO IDEA how excited we were! I can remember every minute detail. While eating a dish of chili, Susan Parr Travel agency called to tell me that our flight to Ethiopia had been cancelled, but we could get to Washington DC. My heart sunk. Right then I knew things weren't gonna go the way I wanted them too. Immediately I cancelled our Lalibela trip and made hotel reservations for DC. Little did I know we wouldn't even make it there!
(My first glance of Yohanna in a teeny tiny room)
I miss the excitement and anticipation of traveling. I miss the "first glance" of my teeny tiny baby girl. Once I was interviewed by the newspaper and one of the questions he asked was "If you could re-live one day what would it be?" My answer wasn't to go back and change things. My answer was the day I gave birth to each of my children. And now I know, Yohanna's "birth" was no exception. I have 4 very special, albeit completely, different days that I will hold close to my heart forever. And whenever I know someone who is experiencing that same emotion that I once had, I feel a tad bit jealous. Not the green-eyed-monster jealous, but the I-wish-I-was-back-in-time-and-it-was-
my-turn jealous.
(After 10 minutes in my arms. Doesn't my face say it all?!!!)
One thing that is assured in this life, you can't turn back time. No matter how much we wish we could. My "first glance" of Yohanna was amazing. It was life-changing, although none of the fireworks exploded like I thought would happen. I miss that our experience and I miss Ethiopia.
On one hand, I can't believe it has already been one year. Yet on the other, it feels like it was forever ago....
3 comments:
I absolutely understand how you feel. When we were in those moments, it seemed surreal and it was hard to really drink it all in. And now that they're gone, I wish I could go back and re-live them with my sweet boy. But, each moment with him each day holds that magic, too. I still look at him and have that flutter - that "I can't believe he's mine" feeling. And I was in such shock the day I met him, I didn't experience the full joy that is my son. Enjoy your little girl:).
Beautiful Gretchen! That first photo of you sitting- reminds me so much of my first with Teg- "Trying to be relaxed and chill so he would be". Such a surreal experience.
I feel like a Seinfeld episode lately- somehow I make it all about "ME". ugh- (get a life shannon)
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